Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Being a celebrity....my POV

I'm up, can't sleep and thinking about Whitney. I remember when I was in the 4th grade I wanted her and Mariah Carey to come to my birthday party. I BEGGED my mama to get them there and promised to be good forever. I cried and cried when they didn't come. (I've always been a mysterious one).

Can you imagine that? Having someone you've never met, especially a child cry over you when all you did was share your God given talent to the world? I couldn't imagine the pressure. We never stop to think about the constant stress that celebrities are under. Sure, they're overpaid and some are undeserving of the fame, but they're still human. Humans with the same emotions, egos, and temperaments that us regular folk have.

Imagine this....you show up for work after being awarded the top performer in your region. You are extremely proud of your accomplishment, after all you are excelling in something that you've wanted to do your whole life, or at least something that you've set your mind to do. Then all of a sudden your co-workers are upset with you! They no longer speak or some are trying to defame you by saying that you cheated or just plain don't deserve the recognition. What do you do? Personally, I have been in this situation and I REACTED! I stopped speaking to them too and defending my achievement. I have always excelled in the game of CYA (cover ya azz) and I brought out the documentation proving that I was deserving. When I didn't feel like "faking it" I didn't. I mugged the people who I knew were causing me grief and I wore my feelings on my face. With that being said....it's hard being successful as a "regular" person!

So, imagine if every time you feel like giving one of those "bish I'll stab you" looks to somebody who you know just wants to drag you through the dirt, you'll have paparazzi and media snapping pics in your face and plastering it on the cover of a magazine with a headline like "Amber says she hates all of her fans and they're all demons". lol And everytime you try to justify or explain your actions, it just gets worse. You can no longer creep with your boo or date more than one person without it being in the news.  Then you have to smile and grin and pretend like everything is OK. I couldn't do it. I'll be like Naomi Campbell or somebody and stay with a negative headline about me. Sad, but I'm not really good with faking. Or I would be like Jasmine Sullivan and stick to my art and skip the interviews, red carpets, etc.

But for the superstars, its got to be hard for them to cope, which is why a lot of them turn to drugs. They use them to stabilize their moods and to be able to keep the smiles on their faces through the bs and foolery. They may start out with their families and friends and a strong relationship with God, but that pressure has to be powerful. And after getting tired of those friends and family members begging for money and not wanting to help themselves anymore because "you got it", its easy to lean towards the 'yes men' and get caught up in that world. Eventually things can get out of control and boom....we've lost another Whitney or Michael, or Richard Pryor, or one of the many other countless stars we've lost to that lifestyle.

This was a super random blog, but I just thought I'd share my point of view on the topic. What do you think? Put yourselves in their shoes and imagine faking it in your life, that you live right now, and increase that pressure 50x's and tell me if you could handle it.

Monday, February 13, 2012

L.OV.Ehhhhh

I know, I know. Another blog post about the most needed, hated, adored, freighting thing of all time.....love. But let's face it, with all the different opinions, experiences, and fairy tales that we've all experienced its kinda nice to gain a different perspective about it. Whether its from a biblical standpoint or comes from observing a functioning relationship, there are so many opinions and viewpoints about it, that its kinda hard not to get wrapped into the phenom.

With Valentines Day quickly approaching, I thought I'd share my two cents on the topic. You ready? Well here it go! lol

So, I'm single. And have been for a LONG time. I would love to be in a relationship with someone who compliments me and makes me want to be a better person, who knows God and lives to be that 1 Peter 3 type of husband, and I his Prov 31 wife, so that we can live that 1 Cor 7 life! But am I in a rush for it? No! It so easy to be discouraged. Seeing images of people who are in love and seemingly happy, and not being able to have that same joy. But its important to realize that not everyone who is in a relationship is happy or has companionship. Some are just as lonely as some single folk! And please understand that just because someone is single, does not mean that they are lonely. It is very possible to be alone, but not be lonely.

So whats the solution? Well, I'm no expert and I get discouraged and lonely just like the next person, but from my personal experience, I can tell you this. You are alone for a reason. There is something that the Lord wants you to work on about yourself before he sends you "the one". Learn to be content with yourself. If you cant stand to be around you, he/she wont either! I know thats an old cliche, but it's oh so true. Be able to answer the question "what do you look for in a man/woman?" I'm 28 and still struggle with an answer to this question. Until I can confidently answer this question and not just say what sounds good, then I have no choice but to remain single. How can you want something, but not know what it is you're asking for? When you get your answer, pray and ask God to not only send him/her to you, but to prepare you for their arrival.

Get a life. Dont just sit around and complain about being alone and how you want to be with someone (Honestly, I struggle with this myself and I have to catch myself). Get involved in something! Church activities, civic organizations, volunteer work, learn a new recipe, walk a dog, do something! Nobody, and I mean nobody (thats worth being with, anyway) wants somebody whose whole life revolves around their mate. There's nothing sexy about that. Ewww. You will be surprised the people you meet or the things that you find out about yourself when you start to do new things. I, for example, volunteer with the YWCA, watching the battered women's children while they attend group sessions. Those kids bring so much joy to my life. I get to teach and show them things that they wouldnt normally get to see or hear. See, I'm a firm believer that we all go through certain experiences just for the sole purpose of teaching someone else the lesson. Never keep your gifts, knowledge, and lessons all to yourself. Help someone else grow!

Ok, well I would keep going, but I'm trying to keep my posts readable. Dont want to lose anyone (if anyone even reads them) in gibberish. lol